It is no secret that men/husbands/spouses occasionally don’t quite know what to do or expect at the time of “the main event”. I’ve seen everything from partners who pass out at the first site of blood, to those who just sit in a corner on their iphones/computers until the baby is born. A major recommendation on keeping a husband/partner calm during labor and delivery is keeping them as informed as possible.
I can’t tell you how many husbands/partners I meet for the first time at “the” delivery. Coming to prenatal visits with your wife would be “HUGE” in terms of providing an opportunity to discuss what to expect at the time of labor, as well as reviewing some of the concepts that are covered in birthing classes. Providing such clarification helps make the birthing process much smoother, not only for the mom, but also for the husband/partner who often times can feel as if they aren’t an important part of the equation. Speaking of which, husbands/spouses are a HUGE part of the equation; after all, none of us would be in the labor and delivery room if it weren’t for you!!!! Small things such as providing a playlist on your ipod to help relax your wife during labor, to feeding her ice chips, or wiping her head with a cool cloth, go a long way with a woman in labor. Taking the initiative to find your wife’s nurse if there are any issues, specifically if things at the hospital “are crazy” is also very helpful. Making a mental note to self that your wife is notherself; i.e., the sweet, loving, sympathetic woman you married, during the labor process, is paramount…..she may say things/do things that hurt your feelings….man up, and blame it on the labor, for women know not what they say or do during labor……Of note, and this is important, none of us, wife included, think any less of you if you just stay at your wife’s side and can’t cut the cord after the birth, or just focus on your wife’s face during the entire delivery process. Passing out at the site of blood or any other bodily fluids that we aren’t accustomed to seeing on a daily basis doesn’t make you any less of a man/human being…..recognizing such just prevents us from having to pick you up off of the floor after the delivery.
Until next time,
Look Better, Feel Better, Be Better.
Dr. Angela